She makes me do things I would never have done before. I'm proud of none of it. Peter is right to be disappointed in me - now there's something I never thought I'd say. He's been disappointed plenty, it's not hard to do with him, but this is probably the first time I have to agree.

I hit her, and I didn't care. It was on par with kissing her, taking her. All the same kind of romance and abuse. Why does she welcome it? Why does she let me in? Why does she love me?

Never going back there alone. I don't trust myself anymore. Need to protect my family from whatever this is. It's over. Now I can go on with my life, and change the future.

Focus. Focus and don't look back.

What the hell is wrong with me?

My wife will be home soon. I have so many things to tell her. I have so many things to not tell her. I'm unsure that an affair a mistake like the one I made would even be necessary to bring this thing to its knees.

Hi, honey. Yeah, I'm feeling a lot better. The daughter I lied about not having miraculously healed me with her regenerative magic blood, so that's why I don't look like a freakshow. But hey, we'll talk more later - I can't stay. I have to go help save the woman I kissed the other day from a supernatural psychokiller who knows where we live.

By the way, I can fly.

Yeah, that'll go down real special.

Aside from, perhaps, my wife, no one knows better than me that in this day and age, even the most crippling of injures are temporary. And obviously I'm not talking about modern medicine. I guess I could explain it to Damaris, but I'd rather let the event speak for itself. If she can walk again, then I won't need to say much at all. If she remains crippled, best I say nothing.

It's not the worst thing, though. The bullet came close enough to cut her face. Jesus Christ.

Villains everywhere you turn.

To Do List

1. Kill a murderer. (Ethical dilemma and illegal, but maybe worth it.)
2. Stop a tornado. (...)
3. Help brother save the world. (Again. Jesus.)
4. Don't get divorced. (re: two sons.)
5. Don't leave your wedding ring in the apartment of the woman who predicted said divorce. (No one likes irony.)

I'm getting in a lot of daytime TV, lately. I never knew how spectacularly bad it was until I had this much time on my hands. I guess there's something therapeutic, though, about watching a lot of other drama unfold in front of you, behind glass, even if it's sometimes in Spanish. It's not my problem, you know?

And now everything else seems to be the same way. Hiro Nakamura occurring twice now, Bennet (apparently the man who raised my daughter) along with him... it's just happening. There's a murderer. There's a company. There's kidnappings. And I'm stuck here at the mercy of whoever decides to teleport or break in or whatever the hell. Just unfolding in front of me, just like TV.

But now I'm thinking more on Peter and it's getting dangerously real. He was meant to live through the explosion. He was meant to come back. I can see how that doesn't work even with... what he's capable of, but I should be a smear on the ground, considering how high I flew that night. Someone caught me, someone got me help.

He hasn't come home. I'm inclined to think he's dead. But now there's something called the Company, that captures people like him. Like me. It's too much to hope for. But I still do.

Damnit, Hiro. It was easier knowing nothing.